Growing up I could always count on one of my aunts, my dad’s older sister, to weigh in on every decision our family made. Well, come to think of it, she also had opinions for the governor of Texas as well as the President of the United States. She stood about four feet, six inches, but she carried a presence that made her seem like the tallest person in a room. No matter the problem, my aunt had answers for everything from politics to health to child-rearing, to spending money and handling husbands.

While I don’t believe I’m a lot like this favorite aunt of mine, I’ve had my fair share of moments when I’ve made my opinions known to God. You know those times. Someone tells us how a friend is struggling over a decision or is having problems with one of their children. We may not say anything out loud but mentally we’re telling the Lord, “I sure would make a different decision. Doesn’t she see that the answer is right there in front of her? Lord, if you’d give me a chance, I could so fix that!” 

Then there are those times when I’ve NOT kept my opinions to myself. Maybe you’ve been there with me as well. I’ve been as verbal and opinionated as Job’s friends in the Bible. There was poor Job who had lost his family, his wealth and his possessions in rapid succession.  In Job 22:21-22, we read some remarks made by Job’s friend Eliphaz in response to all the horrible things that have poured down on Job: “Submit to God and be at peace with Him; in this way prosperity will come to you. Accept instruction from His mouth and lay up His words in your heart. If you return to the Almighty, you will be restored.” Ouch, there’s an opinion and a fix if I ever heard one. An assumption is made that the struggling or hurting person, Job, needs rescuing or somehow needs his friend’s ideas on how to make his life and recovery succeed. With Job’s friend Eliphaz, where was the compassion, acknowledgment of grief, encouragement or understanding that a true friend should give? 

I’m reminded that no matter where we are on the road home, we need far fewer “fixers” and a lot more encouragers and grace-givers. We often define grace as God’s unmerited favor or His undeserved mercy. This is indeed a perfect definition of grace. However, I sometimes forget we are to be grace-givers as well as grace receivers.

Jesus dealt with His fair share of opinionated people with all the answers. In Luke 10:25-28, we read: 

“On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus, ‘Teacher,’ he asked, ‘what must I do to inherit eternal life?’ ‘What is written in the Law?’ Jesus replied. ‘How do you read it?’ He answered, ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ ‘You have answered correctly,’ Jesus replied. ‘Do this and you will live.’”

Love God, Love Others, Love Myself.

No opinions and no fixes, just love. I have to admit that my toes are hurting from being stepped on. Maybe I am more like my aunt than I want to be. I’m reminded that as Christian sisters, we are God’s children, all part of the body of Christ. We are on the road home together. We are more alike than we are different. I owe you and my other Christian sisters what I call a trail of kindness: smiles, encouragement, respect, prayers, a word about Jesus, and my heart-felt compassion. Notice what’s missing? No need for my opinions or my fixes. Just a ton of loving grace to help us get to the finish line!

YOUR TURN:

Are you a “fixer?” What areas of your life do you struggle over control? How do you handle this struggle? Thank you in advance for sharing your heart with the rest of us in the comment section below. You’re the best!